Action Step

Create your perfect parent

Exploring and creating the perfect parent for therapeutic reparenting can be a deeply introspective and healing process.

Either through journaling or a visually creative process, begin to identify and clarify your perfect parent by journaling or creating a mood board to answer the following:

  • What qualities or characteristics does your ideal parent possess? (e.g warmth, empathy, patience)
  • How will your ideal parent respond when you need them most? Reflect on how this part of you can validate your feelings, offer comfort and support. What words or phrases might they use that will comfort you?
  • What nurturing behaviours will they exhibit? (Think about actions such as active listening, offering praise and encouragement etc.)
  • How will your ideal parent set boundaries and provide discipline that is supportive and helpful? (Consider the balance between structure, consistency and flexible and understanding.)
  • How does your ideal parent demonstrate resilience, self-care, healthy communication ad problem solving-skills?
  • How does your ideal parent communicate with you? How do they show affection? How do they respond to conflict or challenges in a nurturing and constructive way?
  • What will it feel like to receive this support, nurturing and care?


Be as detailed and as accurate as you can. The clearer you can be about this part of yourself the more you will be able to tap into this source of love, compassion and support to help you to create the change you want in your life. If using the word parent doesn’t fit for you, you can find another way to label it, such as inner wisdom. The next exercise will help you connect further with this.